megolomaniac

Just like last year…

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?

Got an Oregon Drivers License, lived by myself, bought a car (photos coming soon!), successfully navigated a long-distance relationship.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I did pretty well, honestly. And I’m going to try to revive the ones I’ve been slacking on.  I’m also adding one WHOPPER for 2010 – I am going to run a 5 mile race.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Yes! I got two new baby cousins this year.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No. Thank goodness.

5. What countries did you visit?

Just Canada. Wait, does Vegas count as a foreign country?

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?

Patience.

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

January 20th – Barack Obama’s Inauguration Day (and the day the Kilmorey burned down).

May 9th – Galen took me on our first date.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Living on my own has been very empowering, as silly as that sounds. I always thought I’d hate it, but it’s been pretty nice.

9. What was your biggest failure?

I don’t like this question. I failed to pay a couple of bills on time?

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Nothing more serious that the Swine Flu, thankfully.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

I’m hoping my new(ish) car will fill this role.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

The Blazers.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

I’m going to change those words to “disappointed and confused” and say President Obama. Not overall, mind you, but I’m still sort of confused about a few things, like the deployment of so many troops to Afghanistan.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Rent, car.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Pretty much every time Galen came to visit. And my cousins having babies.

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?

“Boom Boom Pow” – Black Eyed Peas
“Don’t Trust Me” – 3Oh!3
“Battlefield” – Jordin Sparks
“Poker Face” – Lady Gaga
“I’m Yours” – Jason Mraz
“Love Story” – Taylor Swift
“Single Ladies” – Beyonce

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

happier or sadder? Happier
thinner or fatter? Thinner, I think. Maybe the same.
richer or poorer? About the same

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

I wish I’d spent more time in Montana.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

I wish I’d spent less time worrying about the future.

20. Did you fall in love in 2009?

Yes. :)

21. What was your favorite TV program?

The Daily Show, 30 Rock, So You Think You Can Dance, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Boston Legal (reruns).

22. What was the best book you read?

It Sucked and Then I Cried: How I Had a Baby, a Breakdown, and a Much Needed Margarita by Heather Armstrong

23. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Zac Brown Band

24. What did you want and get?

A new job, a new car, A fabulous boyfriend.

25. What did you want and not get?

More sunshine. It’s never enough.

26. What was your favorite film of this year?

Wow, I saw so few (as always). I’m going to have to go with either The Hangover or Bolt. I saw both of them without knowing anything about them, really, so I was pleasantly surprised.

27. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 26 and went to one of my favorite bars with almost all of my favorite people in Portland. It was a wonderful reminder that I have friends of all ages from many different areas of my life, and they’re all amazing.  It was also a reminder that tequila shots are never a good idea.

28. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

I’m going to state the obvious here and say that living in the same city as my boyfriend would have made a huge difference.

29. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?

Jewel tones. And jeans whenever possible. (Damn you, new dress code at work! *Shakes fist*)

30. What kept you sane?

My mom.

31. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

I’m going to change “fancy” to “admire” and go with Heather Armstrong.

32. What political issue stirred you the most?

Healthcare stirred me so much it left me exhausted and more than a little depressed.

33. Who did you miss?

Galen, my family, my friends who live elsewhere.

34. Who was the best new person you met?

It’s hard to believe I only met Galen in April…

35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.

I have very high standards when it comes to my close friends. In return, they have my undying loyalty and love.

36. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

Now my feet turn the corner back home
Sun turns the evening to rose
Stars turning high up above
You turn me into somebody loved

-Somebody Loved, by The Weepies

Remember this post? Well it turns out Sam Adams wasn’t the first one to prove that Portland mayors are just as colorful as Portland citizens… and maybe a little more corrupt.

Connie McCready’s and Bud Clark’s are my favorites. Man, I love the Willamette Week.

Today someone I work closely with was “let go.” This has happened to me before. At my last job, one of my closest coworkers and friends was fired about six months after I started working there. But as with most things, it’s different at a nonprofit.

Of course, all of the regular emotions and issues are in play: Where will she go? What will she do? How will she make ends meet? Particularly in this economy?

But there’s also the question of what our institution just “let go.”

This woman was an integral part of the hospital, the university, and the community that surrounds it. She’d been working there for most of my lifetime, and a significant chunk of hers. There will never be another person who cared as much about the mission, the patients, and the families of the hospital. She was everyone’s go-to gal. If you didn’t know the answer to a question, inevitably someone told you to call her and she had it. She worked harder and longer than the rest of us and never asked for any recognition or attention in return. She cared about her coworkers and always made us laugh. I had talked with her before about why I got involved with The Foundation and she told me about how rewarding her job was. She was the type of person I hoped I would someday be.

Why do they say that they “let someone go?” It’s as if your employer were the only thing holding you up and they just couldn’t do it anymore. What a horrible analogy in this instance. By all means, this woman was the backbone of the place that employed her. Yes, she received a paycheck from them every month, but it was the least they could do in exchange for the glue that held everything together and made the organization what a beautiful thing it was.

Nonprofit organizations are started by people who care more about the mission than they do the paycheck. Many of our employees are like this even now, and that’s after more than 50 years as an establishment. Why is it that when funding is low, the first ones to go are the types of people that started it all?

I don’t have any answers. Just sadness. And the knowledge that things will never be the same.

I haven’t talked about work much recently… Partly because whatever you put on the internet can be read by anyone, and partly because I try not to be a blog-downer.

But today is a little bit different. Today I finally figured out how to put a lot of my frustrations and feelings into words. So I’ve decided to make the following List of Differences Between the Corporate and Nonprofit Worlds (from an employee’s perspective):

In countdown order…

5. You get all those funny holidays off (like Presidents’ Day) that you haven’t “celebrated” since you were in high school. You also get lots of vacation days and people don’t look at you with jealous or angry or disapproving eyes when you put them to good use.

4. Your salary no longer means anything. Your title may be worthless as well. As long as you can pay your bills, consider yourself lucky. Don’t expect things like raises and bonuses – if you get a raise it will be a small percentage and probably won’t add up to much. (Although, of course, you will be thrilled).

3. Regardless of their background, the people you work with will come from the same place you do. They will have similar values and make similar life choices. They may not look like you or want to do the same things on a Saturday night, but when it comes to the things that really matter, they’ll understand you.

2. Working long hours suddenly feels different. It’s still hard. It still isn’t fun. But when you’re working for something that matters to you, it’s not the same as doing something because someone told you to. And even if your superiors don’t recognize your efforts (publicly or privately), you know you did something good for someone. And that can be enough.

1. There will come a time where you are fed up with a situation at work. I don’t mean frustrated – I mean fed up. This is normal in life. If you work in a corporate environment, it’s easy to mentally check out or quit, thinking I don’t need to put up with this. At a nonprofit, however, you might realize that you care more about the organization than you do about your own position. It’s the most baffling thing. Almost any issue I’ve had at work in the last year has ended with me realizing that I love my job and I care about the cause more than I dislike the situation/person/problem. So I’m working to try to make it better.

Did anybody see the episode of the Daily Show where Jon Stewart compared the wait between election day and the inauguration to the days leading up to Christmas?  He said it’s sort of like your parents bought you a bike and wrapped it before putting it under the tree.  Then the bike-shaped package sits under the tree and you have to look at it every day and wait until Christmas morning to open it, even though you can tell it’s a bike.  “Dear Santa,” he said, “PLEASE GIVE US THE BIKE!”

I have become almost completely numb when it comes to outrage over the current administration’s actions.  I was so frustrated and angry for so long, that I had to let it go out of sheer exhaustion.  I still yell at the TV every once in a while, but I’ve just learned helplessness.  In my Developmental Psych class in college, we learned that babies will cry when they’re in a noisy place.  If the noise doesn’t stop after they cry for a while, they go to sleep.  It’s a defense mechanism, and apparently young Democrats can learn to do something similar in the interest of self-preservation.

Karl Rove has apparently started a Twitter account, and last week he wrote this: “Send a farewell letter to President Bush [here he provides an email address] and I’ll give him your note on January 20.” One of my coworkers emailed me the link and told me she sent an email that said, “So long, Cowboy. The last eight years were absolutely terrible. Thanks for ruining the country.”

I don’t even know what I would say to him. I’m almost too tired to think about it. I want him (and his satanic VP) to be tried for their crimes, but I also completely understand the Gerald Ford theory of moving forward instead of looking back. I lived through it once – would reliving it do me any good? Would I really feel better if they were punished? I do think it’s important to make an example of them, but how much time and effort would it take? Would there even be any resolution before Obama’s first term is over? Is there a statute of limitations when it comes to this stuff? Because maybe I’ll be more gung-ho in a few years when my friends aren’t getting laid off left and right and my work day isn’t full of bad news.

At this point, I’m just ready for my bike. And it will be a long time before I’m ready to look back.

I’m copying Blythe, who’s copying Linda’s reflective questionnaire. I’m thinking I’ll do this every year like she does. Any suggestions for questions I should add?

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?

Wow, pretty much everything relating to my job. Worked for a nonprofit in a full-time position? Planned an auction? Been heartwarmed by the work I’m doing?

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I don’t believe I made any new year’s resolutions this year… So I’m doing pretty damned well. And I will definitely be making some for 2009 (coming soon!).

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

My friend Michelle gave birth to an adorable baby boy named Seamus on Christmas day. He turned a week old yesterday!

4. Did anyone close to you die?

Nobody close to me, thank goodness.

5. What countries did you visit?

Canada and Mexico. Yahoo, North America! (This is a HUGE difference from 2007, when work took me to Taiwan, Spain, France, and Japan in addition to my annual Canada trip for fun).

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?

Boots with the fur. To be purchased on Endless shortly…

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

November 4th. History was made.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Honestly? Making cranberry sauce for Thanksgiving dinner that actually tasted good. I can now cook one thing!

9. What was your biggest failure?

Probably not paying for all of those parking tickets when I had the chance (and the money)!

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Well, I tend to get sick fairly often, but nothing major. I’ve always been pretty lucky that way…

11. What was the best thing you bought?

My wool coat, I think. Or maybe my first Jubelale.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

The Democrats. Way to get your act together. And in an election year, no less.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

Still President Bush and Vice President Satan.

14. Where did most of your money go?

To pay rent for my awesome apartment. But other than that, lots of it went towards my car.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Am I focusing too much on Barack Obama becoming President of the United States?

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?

Low – Flo Rida and T-Pain, Bleeding Love – Leona Lewis, So What – Pink, Rehab – Amy Winehouse, Viva la Vida – Coldplay, Mercy – Duffy, anything by Katy Perry or Taylor Swift, and the Mamma Mia! soundtrack.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:


a) happier or sadder? 
happier
b) thinner or fatter? thinner, but this last week may have changed that…
c) richer or poorer? poorer

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Hanging out outside when it wasn’t raining. Walking by the river and in Forest Park.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Beating myself up. Being negative.

20. Did you fall in love in 2008?

Nope. Fingers crossed for 2009!

21. What was your favorite TV program?

Ooh! Either 30 Rock or So You Think You Can Dance. Those were the ones I started watching this year. Then there’s always The Daily Show, Scrubs, and Boston Legal.

22. What was the best book you read?

I’ve had a pretty long string of bad books, but I did like Three Cups of Tea and Eat, Pray, Love (I’m embarrassed to admit it). Plus I received quite a few books for Christmas that I’m looking forward to reading!

23. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Paramore.

24. What did you want and get?

Brian to stay in Portland.

25. What did you want and not get?

Talia, Alex, and both Bens to stay in Portland.

26. What was your favorite film of this year?

Hmmm… Probably either Wall-E or The Dark Knight.

27. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 25 and did a pub crawl with my friends on N Mississippi Ave.

28. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

A relationship that worked out.

29. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?

Low-maintenance clothing in solid colors. I’m guessing that every year I complete this survey, this answer will be the same.

30. What kept you sane?

My roommate. As always.

31. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

I’m going to go with Jon Stewart on this one. I am so predictable.

32. What political issue stirred you the most?

Usually I’m pretty fired up about abortion rights, but this year healthcare was front and center.

33. Who did you miss?

My family. I can’t get enough of them.

34. Who was the best new person you met?

I’m going to go with either Michelle or Jess from work. Sami’s a close third, too.

35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.

I have a hard time enjoying the moment when it comes to relationships because I’m too busy worrying about the future. This is not a good thing. I’m working on it.

36. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

Outside you will find
There is love all around you
It takes you, makes you wanna say

That it’s a beautiful life
And it’s a beautiful world
And it’s a beautiful time
To be here, to be here, to be here

- Beautiful Life, by Fisher

A tree with lights on it and presents underneath is a symbol of Christmas. There is just no getting around this fact. There’s nothing wrong with that, if you ask me – I love Christmas trees. I love Christmas lights more than just about anything. Walking downtown in any city in December and seeing lights on the trees and garlands hung on lampposts cheers me up, no matter how many gifts I still have to purchase with my empty checking account. However, I will never understand why other winter holiday symbols cause problems. See this post in the Portland Mercury Blog.

I wish I were more eloquent and quick-witted, so I could have posted a better comment, but I was too frustrated to see straight, let alone put my thoughts into complete, coherent sentences. Does that man really believe that the tree he put up in Jamison Square is inclusive of all faiths and beliefs? I mean, be honest here, buddy. And what sort of group-think has to be happening for a community association’s board of directors to take down a menorah because a few crazies called in with “negative feedback”? I wonder how much negative feedback Christmas decorations get from non-Christians every year that falls on deaf ears.

Don’t get me wrong, I think the tree should stay. I think anyone who wants to put a tree up in a public place should be able to do so. I just find it ludicrous that this man defends himself by calling it a holiday tree and doesn’t seem to understand why that’s strange. What I’m really worried about is that someone from the board is going to throw a pouting fit and say that from now on, they just won’t put ANY holiday decorations up in the square. How’s THAT for respectful? Are you happy now?!?

My favorite line?

“I told James I guess you could call the Menorah a candle holder if you want, but it’s still a Menorah,” and a Christmas Tree is still a Christmas Tree.”

I also like how the author posted his cell number on the internet for all to see and abuse, just to get the parks liaison to call him back.

Here’s the comment I posted:

I’m really hoping there’s something more to this story that explains why that menorah isn’t there anymore, because otherwise it’s pretty pathetic.

A holiday tree? What holiday can you think of that involves a tree besides Christmas? I suppose there’s Tu B’Shevat, but that’s not for another 6 weeks. And I’m pretty sure there are plans to take that tree down before then.

And I’d be interested to hear what the “negative criticisms or comments” were that Hanberick received regarding the menorah. Because I’m pretty sure any Jewish members of the community could say the same things about the “Holiday Tree.”

What’s wrong with having all of the symbols there? Nobody’s saying you need to take the tree down – it’s great! Keep it there! But how is adding another “candle holder” causing any problems?

Thanks for covering this story. I hope he calls your cell.

It’s no secret that I have a huge crush on John Stewart. This video can just be added to the long list of reasons why. He makes just about every argument I would, and does it while still respecting his guest.

I can’t imagine how angry I would be if I were gay and someone accused me of making that choice. I’m outraged as it is, and I made the choice to be not-gay. The passing of Prop 8 and all of the other similar state constitutional amendments created a sad chapter in American history. Although, I suppose if we came from a history of slavery and ended up electing a black president, we can get through this as well. I just hope it’s soon…

Instead of listing the things for which I’m thankful this year, I’ve decided to show them to you. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

My cousin Kevin writes for the Baltimore Sun. I have always admired him and his writing abilities, (since long before he was published in The Best American Sports Writing) and I love reading his posts. He had one the other day that I particularly enjoyed, which isn’t surprising considering it was about sports, Montana, and Barack Obama.

Anyway, in my lazy NaBloPoMo state, I have decided that my post for today will be a copy of the comment that I just submitted to Kevin’s blog. I spent a while writing and editing it (not that I’m neurotic or anything…) and don’t have much left in me.

So here it is! It won’t make much sense unless you read his post first. Thanks, Kev, for being such a great writer and blogger.

Glad you’re back, Kevin. I really enjoyed this post. And because you said so many interesting things, I’m going to comment on a few…

I thought that Post article was interesting, and I was heartened to hear that so many small town folks were examining their prejudices during this campaign and also encouraging their community’s young people to travel and experience more diversity.

However, I’m always sensitive to the use of the term “diversity” to mean “black people.” When I lived in Montana, I used to think there wasn’t any diversity, in the true sense of the word. However, now, having seen other places, I realize that, as my mom says, “our diversity just looks different.” In a lot of ways, I think the fact that I grew up exposed to so few black people made me think that that was the only kind of diversity. When, in fact, I was surrounded by minorities with which many other people from larger cities may not be as familiar. Hmong and Russian immigrants, Native Americans, as well as members of the GLBT community colored my world in very important ways and helped me become the person I am. In some ways, moving away from Montana has made me realize this because the city I currently call home doesn’t include them all.

I would never argue with someone who said Montana was severely lacking African-Americans. However, I don’t believe it isn’t a diverse state.

That being said, I’m sure that some of the small towns in the Post article don’t include much diversity, be it racial, socioeconomic, or any other kind. Hopefully Barack Obama will be a positive influence in their lives in more ways than one. It sounds like he already has.

I loved your view on sports as a unifying force. Fivethirtyeight.com was a fixture in my daily surfing, and I always think about the power of sports when used in analogies. When I saw Michelle Obama’s brother speak, it was interesting to see the way the crowd reacted to his sports analogies… I had the same thought you did – this is something almost everyone can understand and relate to. Granted, the crowd wasn’t very politically diverse, but still an interesting concept.

Thanks for the great post. And welcome back!